As I stop to ponder this eternal question at this point on my journey of growth, the afore mentioned song immediately springs to mind & spins over & over as a joyous roller coaster of visions and ideas catch me in their flow …..
The meaning of life, my vision & purpose in it, has taken many shapes & forms over the years, it is a constant evolution.
For a long while, during my late teens & early twenties I did not know what I wanted to do or be, I didn’t really know who I was & had not yet grown into comfort within my own skin, life seemed to stretch way out in front of me with no obvious sign posts or directions.
I was content enough tojust drift, living moment by moment, and yet, under the surface, was left feeling that I ‘ought’ to know, ought to be moving along some kind of career path as the years passed by & was slightly envious of those who knew where they were headed or were ‘made’ for their job.
There were plenty of things that interested me, particularly the arts and holistic therapies. I enrolled in many courses & enjoyed the process of learning, yet when the courses came to an end, there was always an underlying sensation that I was not good enough to make it in that modality as a career, fear & uncertainty kept me in check, and there was always another course to sign up for as a distraction!
In my mid twenties, travel felt like the right thing to do, a real break from the old routine, it certainly was good for the soul.
Motherhood came along in my late twenties & completely engulfed my life,(in a good way!) at last, I felt like I had a true purpose & the days were surely as full as any in paid employment!! I had a passion & a drive to protect, to care for, to LOVE and to educate the three small people in my life.
Feeling proud of the delightful small beings I was raising, I was hugely complemented when one of their pre-school teachers asked if I was early childhood trained ( one course I had NOT enrolled in!!) & suggested I should look into doing so. Destiny stepped in, and the opportunity to do just that presented itself several weeks later – I opened to the possibility & the rest fell into place. Study resulted in part time work with hours that work perfectly with a young family.
However, as joyous as the whirlwind of motherhood is, I also began to totally lose track of who ‘I’ was, & slowly, but surely, I began to unravel.
Since my first taste in my early twenties, yoga has always been my rock, my solitude, my anchor in the changing, turbulent tides of life. It offers stability, sanity & support for my physical, emotional & spiritual self that I have not found elsewhere.
In 2012 I learned of up-coming Yoga Teacher Training here, at the studio I know & love. THIS was an opportunity NOT to be missed!! I enrolled & in 2013 for the first time in my life I embarked on a journey towards what feels like my true calling.
It was not an easy process, studying, working part time & still whole-heartedly parenting our three small children, to say nothing of the life changing nature of YTT!!! Yet there was such a strong pull, a certainty that this was right, there was not even a doubt that I would not use this qualification!!
I felt I had at last found my purpose in life.
Through yoga & its process of self inquiry, I am learning to shape the vision of my life & am constantly amazed by the power of manifestation when we allow ourselves to open to its force & creativity.
I have always loved journalling & have turned to the solace of the written word in times of great joy or distress.
It is worthy of note, that in times where change has been most needed, I have written, listed, asked on paper for this shift, and come to discover, months, or years later, when re-reading these entries, that I did indeed receive my wishes.
I have also written requests & left them out under the full moon, painted, sketched & collaged the changes I envisaged.
I love to look back over these entries with a deep sense of gratitude for their facilitation and a deep sense of trust that I can use these skills to move forwards when needed.
Of greatest importance is creating space, an oasis of calm amid the busy-ness of everyday life, where you can pause & reflect & allow your inner visions & desires to surface, to bubble to the top, whether this be by coming to your mat, starring up at the stars, taking a guided meditation, a walk in the bush, a dip in the ocean, singing, dancing or the luxury of time out on retreat, ask yourself “what is really important?” And then have the wisdom & the courage to build your life around your answer.
Ask for the change you wish to see, don’t be afraid to be specific! Be playful, keep an open heart, and if in doubt, play a little Soul to Soul!!
Bek teaches our all levels Tuesday evening yogaclass
5.30 – 6.45 pm